Category: Parenting

Things I Pray I Never Forget

Things I Pray I Never Forget

Posted on by Rebecca

I don’t know if I am ready. I look down and feel your soft cheek and stare in awe at your long eyelashes. Squeeze your tiny foot and notice how it fits into my whole hand. You are growing so quickly and have slipped into our family with such ease, I feel like we are missing the moments, the milestones. You’re grabbing things with intent now and try to put them all in your mouth. I don’t know if I’m ready for you to be my last baby. The last one I get to cradle and comfort. The last one I get to nurse, the last one I get to squeeze and kiss.

So here are some things I hope I never forget:

  • Your superman like stretch when I lift you up after a feed. Your arm goes up your back stretches out and you make the cutest little expression on your lips.
  • Your sweet sweet milky kisses
  • Your chunky, chunky, chubster thighs and all their beautiful squishiness
  • The way your little feet kick like crazy in the bath
  • The way you have discovered how to suck your thumb, and the intent you look at your hand with as you turn it to put into your mouth
  • Your chubby little hands, soft fingers and dimpled knuckles
  • Your sweet little gurgles and baby sounds
  • The way you giggle when I tickle your neck
  • Your little mouth pulling down and your button nose wrinkling up when you are upset
  • Your chubby, chubby soft cheeks (there’s a chubby trend here in case you didn’t notice)
  • Your call at night when you wake for a feed, it’s like a little kitten
  • The way your arm rotates and hits me in the chest when you are nursing, and the way you stare into my eyes
  • The way you sometimes stop, mid feed, just to pop your head up to look at me. You make me laugh so much!

Motherhood is always such a catch 22. You want your child to grow up strong and healthy but at the same time you never want them to grow up at all. Some people think I’m absolutely mad, not knowing if you are my last baby or not, but its easy to consider another when you are so very easy to love my Raya Bug. Thank you for choosing us to be your parents and thank you for coming into our lives.

All photographs are copyright of Slumberlings Photography and In these Stilettos

Third Time Around – A Birth Story Of A Princess

Third Time Around – A Birth Story Of A Princess

Posted on by Rebecca

Hearing a good birth story is extremely powerful. I used to read through dozens when I was pregnant. Listening to other women’s stories empowers and educates you for your own, it inspires courage. This was my third baby and second V-Bac and I hope that it gives comfort to any of you out there, wondering if you can do it. Our bodies are absolutely incredible, listen to your body, listen to your gut, you can do whatever you set your mind too.

Here is Raya’s story:

To our beautiful baby girl, at just over 3 months old I think its time you had your first little letter dedicated to you and your birth story. I’ve written about your brothers and before it starts to get all hazy and memories fade I thought let me put yours down.

Your pregnancy was by far the most trying one I have had. Not that it was awful, it just felt like I was pregnant forever. I also had every single pregnancy “ailment” one could think of which made me so uncomfortable. But, Alhumdullilah, both you and I managed to stay healthy and strong throughout it.

I was determined to have a second V-Bac; having had an emergency c-section with your brother and a V-bac the second time, I knew the natural recovery was a waaaay easier option. I knew my body could do it and I wanted you to come on your own accord. I even contemplated a home birth with you and considered an all natural option.

You kept me waiting right until the end, like both of your brothers. At 41 weeks, I was due to go in to have either an induction or a c section on the Thursday morning. Wednesday was spent dropping and fetching your brothers from school, eating dates, drinking Raspberry Tea and walking to try and get you here. Thankfully, you heard my prayers and just before Midnight on Wednesday night, as I was doing some last minute cupboard organisation (and climbing up and down off a chair), my waters broke. This wasn’t my first rodeo, so I went downstairs to tell your dad, double checked everything was all packed and tried to get some sleep. I was in no rush to head to hospital just yet, and I wanted to stay comfortable at home for as long as possible. Your big brother woke up at about 1h30 and I took him back to his room and lay with him, timing the contractions as they came. It only took about an hour until they were 3 or 4 minutes apart and started to get a “little” sore. The warm waters of a hot shower helped to ease the pain and I got dressed, did my make up (of course I did) and at about 3h30 am woke your dad up to tell him it was time to get to the hospital. He woke up, had a cigarette and was taking his time in the shower! You’ll soon realise that I don’t swear much at all, but at this point, as I was trying to breathe through the pain, I “politely” told your dad that now was not the best moment to take his sweet time.

4 am seems to be our “go to the hospital” time, its the same time we went to the hospital with your brother too. I held onto the crash bar and lifted my bum off the seat the whole way to the hospital (the bumps on the road were so uncomfortable). We walked into the hospital just before 4h30 and did all the pre-checks and paperwork. I had to hold on to the counter for support and couldn’t talk while the contractions happened, so I knew you wouldn’t be too far off. All the normal labour rooms were full so they put us into the examining room and drew the curtains. I can safely say at this point there was about a minute or two between the contractions and they were more than a little painful. We had the coolest mid-wife who was chilled and calm about everything and was rushing between our room and another. She was hip and told me to “do your thing mama” and didn’t keep me strapped down to the monitors, which I was grateful for. She joked we would end up delivering at the same time as next door and I estimated you would make your appearance at 6h30 am. By 5h30 am, I still hadn’t received my requested shot of pethidine (I think the midwife was trying to get me to go natural) but at this point my tiredness was taking over, and I craved relief from the pain. She finally came back with it but I’m convinced she didn’t give me a full dose because it didn’t really “take the edge off”, or it could have been because I was too tired. Your daddy was there supporting me as always, but when it comes to labouring I am super frigid. I don’t want to be touched or talked to, I want your presence next to me but don’t freaking touch me 🙂

The doc arrived just before 6am and at that stage I was pretty much 9 or 10 cm and she just told me to call her when I felt that “urge to push” – (mama’s reading this, you know what I mean). At 7am I still hadn’t had the overwhelming urge (I mean it was there, but not really strong like it was with your brother) and was starting to worry as the lady next door had already delivered. Being a V-Bac I knew time and progression was of the essence and I sure as hell didn’t want you to be an emergency C-section. So I told a little white lie and told my doc I was ready (in hindsight maybe not the best option). I had 2 or 3 pushes and then it seemed like my contractions weren’t strong anymore, I couldn’t feel them as much and it felt like they were taking too long (could have also been the pethidine). I was pushing and bearing all the weight down in my neck (I felt it the next day) and not enough into my legs. They pulled out the stirrups and on push 3 Doc told me if your head didn’t drop down more she was going to have to use the vacuum (I had no objections), but if the vacuum didn’t help pull your head down she was going to operate… Push 4 and what seemed like a never ending push (I ran out of breath, have you ever tried taking another deep breath whilst still pushing down?? Its freaking impossible); you finally entered the world.

At 7h24 am on the 18th April 2019 you were placed on my chest for the first time, I will never forget the feeling of holding your warm, slippery body on my chest. You were so so warm and my body temperature by then was so so low. The first thing I noticed was how big you were and what an incredible amount of hair you had (explains the 2 solid weeks of agonizing heart burn I had). You weighed 3.68 kgs and opened your eyes immediately. Your daddy cut your cord and whispered Azaan in your ear. I almost gave up. I said to my doctor in that last push that I couldn’t push anymore and “I give up”, but the moment you were placed on my chest everything was forgotten about. Everyone else disappeared and in that moment it was just you and I.

I hadn’t had a drip or anything while I was in labour so they put that in afterwards while they cleaned up a bit and waited for my blood pressure to stabilize before wheeling us to our ward at 9 am (I lost a decent amount of blood with you). The first thing I did was order a giant bowl of hot oats and a pot of tea 🙂 Your daddy went home to get some sleep and you slept on my chest the whole morning, skin to skin. Of course I didn’t sleep a wink yet because every 30 minutes in hospital there is a knock on the door, checking blood pressure, changing dustbins etc. I realised at about 10am that I hadn’t even tried to “feed you yet” (it shocked me because Id done that immediately with your brothers, but you hadn’t even cried!) and you latched with ease and strong force. By noon I begged the nurses to let me go and bath and get cleaned up, I didn’t want your brothers seeing any “mess” when the came to meet you. They came in awe to meet their baby sister at about 2pm and were so unsure and cautious. It was so precious and I’m so glad your auntie was there to capture the moment.

Your narnie spent the night with us in the room and once the doc came around the next morning to do her rounds she gave us the all clear to go home if we wanted to! So you came home and completed our family of 5 on your very second day.

Raya Maryam you have always been with us, it’s like you have always been a part of the family and are the sweetest baby ever. You are happy, smiley, patient and you hardly ever fuss. Your brothers are obsessed with you and you are your dad’s baby love. I cant wait to adventure with you and watch you discover the world. We are so in love with you and will always be by your side, lifting you up.

all newborn shoot photos were done by Slumberlings Photography and all photographs are subject to copyright.

Finding Your “WHY” And Remaining True

Finding Your “WHY” And Remaining True

Posted on by Rebecca

The whole Instagram hiding likes thing versus drops in engagement has got me thinking recently…

I found myself over the past few days noticing a HUGE drop in the number of “likes” I received on Instagram, of course it worried me. It concerned me that I wasn’t putting out enough good content, it concerned me that my readers weren’t relating to my content anymore. Thankfully I’m old enough and wise enough to not take it personally and to understand that Instagram is going through some changes, but it got me thinking about all the users who do measure their sense of worth and self belief against this tool. Scary thought right? The only reason I ever started paying attention to “likes” is because I know that brands look out for it to measure ROI, but true engagement means so much more then just a heart button.

The amount of times I haven been approached by people on Instagram who want to “get into blogging”, looking for advice on how to start is more than I can count. Before I give advice away, my one response to everyone will always be, is “WHY”? What is your passion? Would you still blog if there was no Instagram? Would you still share your thoughts and stories if there weren’t any “perks”?

Now more then ever, with the changes in algorithms and measures of engagement, you should definitely keep sight of your purpose. It’s one of the reasons why I hate the term “influencer”. Yes, I can fully understand why it’s used, but I truly believe no individual can call rightfully call oneself an “influencer”. People around you can refer to you as one, but an “influencer” should come from a natural place. It should be an honest, first hand experience, not just someone plugging every single branded item. It should come from a place of authenticity. So if you start your blogging career with the aim to “be an influencer”, my suggestion is to walk away. Times are changing.

My “WHY” is, and has always been to help other mothers. In whatever way that may be; whether it’s to inspire you with creative crafts and activities to do with your children, or the best places to go that are child friendly in your area (the top reasons I started my blog up again); I want to help mothers on their journey. If you’re a new mom in that crazy, whirlwind newborn phase, and you don’t know what to do or where to turn, I’m here for you. If you’re starting out on your breastfeeding journey or experimenting with solids for the first time, I can relate, I am just a message away. Motherhood is my “WHY” .

Motherhood is something you can never actually understand or prepare for until you are in it. Becoming a mother for the first time is one of the most confusing, self doubting stages in all your life, whether you are the smartest woman in the world or not, we all experience the same things. I wanted to create a community and a safe space for any mum to reach out. For all mums to know that we are in it together and to create a community where we can all support one another along the way.

I may have gotten caught up a little with measuring my worth against others with more hearts on a social media page, but ultimately, you are all my “why”. So thank you, thank you for staying with me in this journey of motherhood. Thank you for reminding me of why I chose to blog and for being “my why”.

Chronicles Of A Working Mum – Tips To Help On Your Breastfeeding Journey

Chronicles Of A Working Mum – Tips To Help On Your Breastfeeding Journey

Posted on by Rebecca

I love being a working mother, I love being able to have my “own identity” at work and earning my own money. I love being a mother slightly more though, and my children are by far the greatest gift I have ever been given and the most important thing in my life.

The hardest thing you will ever have to do is “go back to work” after having a baby. I have been extremely blessed so far in my career to work for organizations that are flexible in terms of hours and working conditions, something I am pleased to say is becoming easier in South Africa. I only truly “went back to work” with my eldest, and I did that for 4 months before finding a role that allowed me to work from home and be with my boys for over 4 years. Now on baby 3 I find myself “returning to the workplace” once again, leaving a little 3 month old baba at home.

Yes, part of me wants to “run back to the office”. Lets be honest here, and don’t judge me, having been a “stay at home” mum and a “working mum”, it’s a hell of a lot easier on some days to run away to the office and let your caregiver take care of the crying, nap times and feeds. A large part of me however, also wants to stay at home and soak in every single cuddle and sweet smile. The years fly by and in the blink of an eye she will be walking and talking. But, like 90% of South Africa’s women, I need to go back into the office and I am beyond grateful that I have a super nanny to look after my babygirl and I don’t need to put her into a creche yet.

The hardest part of going back to work is always the preparation stage. If you are breastfeeding, it’s making sure whenever you have a free moment, that you are pumping milk to freeze. It’s getting baby used to the nanny/ caregiver and allowing them to learn each other. It means sitting in another room and using all your might not to run and hold baby at every single cry. Hearing your baby crying but knowing that you need to let another person get used to her and understand her cues, to learn her signals like you do as her mother.

The one thing I can do for my babygirl is feed her, and I wouldn’t give that up for the world. Breastfeeding for me is just the most special journey. I breastfed my eldest for over a year, my second son for over 2 years and although circumstances are different now, I fully intend to feed my babygirl for over a year too. Maintaining a corporate career and breastfeeding a baby is a full on commitment in itself and one that I certainly wouldn’t be able to do with some help along the way.

If you are planning on keeping up your supply whilst working there are a couple of things you can do to help you on your journey:

  • Firstly, a really great double pump, and make sure you get a hands free bustier. I’m currently using the Medela Freestyle and loving it! Its compact and small and has a fully chargeable lithium battery, meaning I can pop down to my car to pump (open plan offices and clear glass windows in meeting rooms aren’t great for pumping). It takes 17 minutes from start to finish for me to pump out a full feed for Raya, and with the hands free bustier I can even carry on working. Nothing makes you feel more like a superwomen then multitasking 🙂 They key is to try and pump as close to baby’s normal feeding times as possible. I make sure I have enough of a freezer stash available to last a week or two and then whatever I pump that day gets replenished. As soon as I am at home, baby feeds from me as normal.
  • Mrs Milk Lactation Bars – Different to traditional lactation cookies in that Mrs Milk provides nutrition, for both mum and baby. “Mrs Milk” bars are fantastic for busy mama’s, not only providing you with key “milk boosting” ingredients like fenugreek, flax and brewers yeast, but also providing you with nutrition and energy for the day ahead. Calories are important when breastfeeding and life is chaotic! We often forget things like breakfast or snacks when you are running between work and kids, and Mrs Milk bars are the perfect in between! They fill you up with all the right things and come in two flavours, the classic and the green apple and moringa (my favourite).
  • Lactation Cookies – I have also been munching my way through “Nursing Mama” cookies. The ULTIMATE pick me up treat 🙂 No more mid afternoon or late night choccies for me, because these lactation cookies curb every craving. They are super yummy and come in 3 flavours, coconut and almond (my favourite), peanut butter and chocolate as well as white chocolate and almond. There is even a range to help curb morning sickness.  I find some of the flavours a little sweet, but I love the fact that you can buy pre-mixes, because honestly, who has time to run around looking for ingredients like flax seed and brewers yeast? When I bake the pre-mixes I just add a little less chocolate or sugar in to suit my taste.
  • Hydration – Goes without saying. Water=Milk, in this case anyway. If you do not increase your hydration, you will not produce enough breastmilk. It’s that simple. So whether its herbal, nursing teas, or plain old water; drink drink drink!
  • Finally a crucial item you need to consider, and it just occurred to me whilst I was pumping in the car, is your clothing! So here’s a HUGE shout out to companies like Cherry Melon, Sophie and Jane as well as Mama Noo nursing, who make breastfeeding friendly underwear or clothes. There is a BIG difference in being able to pump or feed discretely when it comes to the clothes you wear. Cherry Melon has some fantastic feeding cami’s that unclip at the strap, I wear these under my work clothes everyday, which allows me to maintain a sense of dignity whilst pumping 🙂

Wherever you are in your breastfeeding journey, know that you aren’t alone. Its tough but it is manageable. Its also a very personal journey, so if you feel that the natural cycle has come to an end, that okay too. This post though is here to encourage you. You can do it, if you want to. There will be ups and downs and ebs and flows, but we have incredible support in this motherhood community, and if you feel you don’t have any, I am here for you!

Learning To Read : A Whole New Chapter

Learning To Read : A Whole New Chapter

Posted on by Rebecca

There are many noteworthy milestones in a child’s life, but learning to read has to be right up there. The whole “learning to read” process is incredible and something that is so unique to each child. To see everything just slowly starting to click is wondrous, an entirely new world opens up and I cannot wait till we fully dive into it. My eldest (5) is learning phonics at school at the moment. When his class teach mentioned in the beginning of the year that me may even be able to read by the end of the year, I thought she was joking, he’s only in grade R, but let me tell you, phonics are an INCREDIBLE THING!

Each week they have a different “focus” letter at school, “curly kuh” or “kicking kuh”, “annie apple” or “harry hat man”. Activities are then related to that letter and each time they speak about the pronunciation of it. We have to duly cut out pictures being with that letter every weekend and art for the week is focused on it. Just a few weeks ago Aadam read his very first word! R-E-D, he saw it on TV and said “Rra – ehhh – daaa”, “RED mama” !! I want to pause that moment in time forever. My heart was so proud it could have exploded! We are far from reading properly and I am in no way going to force him, but since then he has “read” a few other words by himself as well, “sun” , “dog” and “mat”.

I am by no means a teacher, I’m not a professional in any way, but we’ve done a few activities over the years at home that have focused on letter recognition and I think at this age it all starts coming together. Reading and writing go hand in hand and by practicing letter recognition with some fun activities, reading can quickly follow.

Here are a few fun activities you can do at home to practice letter recognition. It’s all learning through playing so your child wont feel like they are “working” in any way.

Spray the letter

Write out letters randomly on an outside wall with some chalk and give your child a spray bottle or water pistol. Get them to “spray” out the letters from words such as their name or other simple 3 letter words.

Letter hunt

I purchased some crafty foam letters and flash cards from our favourite book and stationary store, CNA , and hid the foam letters in some rainbow rice. Place a flashcard out and get your little one to dig through the rice to find the matching letters. As they are matching the letters, sound them out individually. The 3 letter words are always an easy start.

Word Tubes

These are so ridiculously easy to make and such a fun way to learn. We have made 2 different kinds before. The first is done simply by taking two paper cups. On one of them write out common endings like “at”, “all” and “it” and on the other write out letters like “m”, “f”, and “s”. Cut a window through the outer cup and twist to form the words. It can also be easily done with plastic eggs (I told you those little guys are versatile). Again on one side write one letter and on the bottom write the common endings. Sit with your child as they twist the egg and sound out each word.

Read Read Read

As simple as it may sound, but reading to your children is the best way to teach them how to read themselves. Making books part of your daily life is so important. They watch your lips move and form words, improves language skills, shows them that words represent sounds and concepts, words are read from left to write, and stories continue when you flip the page. Start from as young as possible to foster a love for reading with bedtime stories or library time. CNA has some great phonics books, in additional to all their reading books for kids, if you are interested in diving deeper into a more structured learning approach at home.

Writing out letters

Whether its tracing them out in a wipe and erase book, or using more Montessori type activities such as writing them out in Sand, using a brush with rice or even shaping the letters out of playdough. Its all about recognition and muscle memory. Sounding out each letter as you go and then practice by linking the sounds.

Watching a child enter this whole new world of literacy is just so magical. I am in awe of how quickly children can pick up on things and how many doors of opportunity this will open. Though i know on the other hand its going to open up a whole new ball game in parenting. Newspaper and magazine headlines will bring numerous questions and conversations but I cannot wait! There are some fantastic resources available to help us on this journey as parents, free printables online or books and learning aids from stationary stores. Reading is truly one of the greatest gifts for a child to learn and one that every single child should have a chance to learn.

Disclaimer: This post was sponsored by CNA

That First “Real” Playdate

That First “Real” Playdate

Posted on by Rebecca

I don’t know how we got here. Time’s flown by so quickly, in the blink of an eye and now we are here… it’s time, my baby is going on his first ever “real” playdate. By “real” I mean sans mama. It’s a drop and go without me and I am absolutely petrified! I found myself in this situation a few months ago and after chatting to a few other mama’s I know I’m not alone in this ocean of emotions.

So lets talk about that first playdate. My eldest came home from school the other day (he is 5) and said “Mom, my friend needs your phone’s password!” “Password ? Why does he need my password?” I enquired, “So his mum can phone you to arrange a playdate!”, now it makes sense 🙂 He needs my phone number! Wow, I didn’t see that one coming, and I certainly didn’t think I would get emotional about it, but I had a mini break down! This isn’t just the boys going around to play at my bestie’s house (that’s different, I know them like the back of my hand), this is a real school friend. A friendship formed between the two of them, without parents around.

My own childhood was spent happily playing at my friends houses, and they would play at mine too. Having a mum that ran her own business meant I would often go home with friends after school and we would spend our afternoons swimming, riding bikes, eating “fruits of the forest” yoghurts and making forts up in trees. I LOVED it, and I can’t wait for my kids to start experiencing all those memories. However, I’m also nervous, happy, proud and a teeny tiny bit sad that my baby is officially growing up.

What to do you take? Will they go swimming? What will they eat? Do I pack snacks? Do I know have to return the offer and schedule one in return? What happens if they get hurt?

It’s a little like their first day at big school! Sooo many questions to consider, soooo many thoughts running through my mind. Thankfully, his friends mother was more seasoned at this then I was, having older daughters. I think she sensed my anxiety, and messaged me to say I didn’t need to stay and put my mind at ease. She also sent me photo’s throughout the afternoon so I could see my baby was having a great time.

We also has another factor to consider, in the food we eat. Aadam is good and he knows when he is not at home he is not allowed to eat meat if mummy and daddy are not around (we are strictly halaal), so we have already said to him no biltong snacks, no hot dogs etc and he is very good about making sure of that.

Its also brought about a new dynamic between him and his brother. This signifies a new chapter. They are going off down their own independent paths. The terrible twosome is going to be divided, they are going to start having their own friends and own “plans”, I just pray they always stay as close as they are and they don’t leave one another out.

I’m happy to report that the playdate went really well. It helped that I know his buddy is the sweetest little boy ever. They have struck up the cutest friendship and I know his family shares a lot of the same values, so from that side of things, I wasn’t nervous at all.

This was a huge milestone for me and one I struggled with immensely. A few things helped me get through:

  • Be completely honest with the other parent. Find out what is expected, where will they be playing (indoors/outdoors) and which parent will be around to supervise. Don’t forget to ask or mention any allergies as well.
  • I packed Aadam a bag the first time, with his bottle of water and some snacks (just in case he was too shy to ask for anything). He totally didn’t need it but it made mama feel better.
  • We baked a little cookie treat to take with to say “thank you”.
  • I thought it best for the first playdate to leave his younger brother out of the picture, he would be more likely to ask for me, or to get tired quickly. This was Aadam’s day, but I made sure to do something special with his younger brother, so he didn’t feel left out.
  • Set a time and stick to it. I feel 2-3 hours are adequate for a play date. For the first I set it at 2 hours, which I felt was enough time for us both to feel comfortable. You definitely don’t want to overstay your welcome and I certainly didn’t want my baby wondering where mummy was (turns out he didn’t want me to get there so soon and would have quite happily played for much longer).
  • If you are hosting – send the other mum pics of them playing or having a good time. Trust me, it makes such a big difference to the other mum.

Child’s play is completely unpredictable so don’t have too many expectations, go with the flow and the kids will have a great time! Did you worry about your child’s first play date? Do you have any other tips to share with parents?

Sleep Aids To Help Baby – The GRO Company

Sleep Aids To Help Baby – The GRO Company

Posted on by Rebecca

Just when the boys started sleeping through the night (well almost, apart from jumping into our beds every other night, but that doesn’t count does it?), we go and dive into the newborn realm again. Cue broken sleep, swaddling and constant bags under my eyes.

I thought we were pretty sorted, with Raya being our third child there wasnt much that we “needed” in terms of product, in fact, for my baby shower, I asked for vouchers just to stock up on nappies etc. Let me just tell you however, since having Yusuf 4 years ago, so much has changed! There are alot of new products on the market that we never had with the boys.

The GRO company recently launched into the South African market, through TommmeeTippee and over the past month I have been using some of the award-winning sleep aids that they produce.

Both Raya and my youngest son are winter babies, which typically involves a ton of temperature control and sleeping sacks. The GRO Company was founded by two parents who battled to get their baby to sleep, they were introduced to “Sleep Bags” and after a 12 hour sleep as a result, the Grobag was born! Since then they have diversified their range all with the aim to help with a better nights sleep. So if you’re a mama to be, or are battling with bed time, you may want to read on and add some of these products to your wish list!

The GroEgg2

The GroEgg is a fantastic addition to any sleeping space. In the blink of an eye you can glance to check that the room temperature is comfortable for baby to sleep in. It changes colour based on the temperature, blue being too cold of course and red being too hot. At optimal temperature it gives off an orange/yellow hue. It also acts as a fantastic night light.

GroFriends

Our little “Owlie” is a gorgeous addition to the nursery and as baby gets a bit older will be a great soothing comfort to her (if her brothers give it back to her). The little friends can attach to the side of the crib and play soothing lullabies. They are sound activated and can sense crying, so when baby wakes the Gro Friend plays sounds to soothe and comfort baby. Its travel friendly and also has a nightlight option.

  • Their built in CrySensor allows them to listen out for noises made by baby. When the CrySensor is activated, the Grofriends will automatically start playing their soothing sounds and help settle your child back to sleep.
  • Ollie The Owl and Percy The Penguin can hear all noises within a room but are specifically programmed to react to crying or sharp sounds which may disturb your child.

The GRO Snug

This has been used every night for the past 3 weeks! The GroSnugis a 2-in-1 swaddle and sleep sack. You can keep baby’s arms in, or open up the poppers to let them out. Raya has quickly outgrown hers (she is super tall) and we will absolutely be buying another one. Ours is a gorgeous coral/pink colour it has a unique shaped skirt giving baby plenty of room to kick and sleep in a natural froggy legged position. Its suitable from birth upto 5.5 kgs. Personally I LOVE that it opens up from the bottom, meaning you can easily do night time nappy changes without disturbing baby.

GROclock

One of my favourite products from the Gro Company has to be the GROclock. My boys are absolutely loving it! I was struggling with my youngest son waking up at the crack of dawn and not going back to sleep. The GROclock allows you to set a “wake up” time. The LCD screen shows images of the sun, moon and stars to communicate sleep and wake up times. It shines a sunshine yellow when its time to “wake up”. It has a digital clock but it also has visual imaging. Once you set the clock for the night, it has “stars” around the face, with each star representing an hour of sleep. So for kids that can’t tell the time, they can easily wake up and see “there are 3 stars left”. It has an alarm clock feature, which my eldest loves. Now when they wake up all the do is glance at the screen to see if its wake up time.

Other features include a handy key lock option so kids can change the time by themselves as well as an option to set two separate wake-up times; one for nap time and one for night.

The boys anxiously waiting for their clock to turn to sunshine, which means they can leave their room.

GRO Swaddle Dry

All hooded towels are NOT created equal. This uniquely shaped swaddle towel is an absolute game changer, especially in winter! Made from the softest puredry mirofibre it makes for super quick and easy drying for baba, wrapping her up in a blanket like warmth after her bath. The swaddle shape helps me to wrap her up tight and settles her quickly after bath time.

Its machine washable, can be tumble dried and it comes in 4 fun characters. The Swaddle Dry is suitable for upto 6 months and from there they can move onto GRO Towels which are made from the same super soft and absorbent puredry microfibre, as well as the GRO Robes which I think I need to get for the boys.

The Gro Company products are available from Takealot.com, Baby City, Loot, Charleys Boxes, or selected BabiesRUs stores.

GIVEAWAY – WIN A GRO HAMPER WORTH R1500 !!

As a mum of 3 I know the value of a good nights sleep. I have reached the depths of exhaustion and have tried every single trick in the book. Together with the GRO company I will be giving away a hamper to one lucky parent.

The prize includes:

  • 1 x Grotowel
  • 1 x Grobag 1 TOG 0-6m
  • 1 x Groegg2
  • 1 x Grolight

To enter: Make sure you are following In these Stilettos on Instagram and Facebook. All entries will be done via the social media pages and winners will be announced on Thursday June 20.

“Nursery” Reveal – Making The Most Of Small Spaces

“Nursery” Reveal – Making The Most Of Small Spaces

Posted on by Rebecca

I’ve debated for a while now whether to do this post or not, because well, our littlest doesn’t really have a “nursery”. In fact, its something I only ever did with our eldest. With Aadam, I painted the room in a soft muted grey, found the cutest elephant decals, had candy stripe walls etc. It was fun, and I loved that room, I spent hours in there (obviously). With your second and third child though these things don’t matter as much. Lets be honest, for the first few months baby sleeps in your room, next to or in your bed. We have moved around a little and have been renting the past few years, so we aren’t as free to paint the walls any colour of the rainbow either.

All that being said, this is my first little girl, and I wanted a space especially for her. The problem is, we have 3 kids and a 3 bedroom house. The boys share a room, I always wanted them too, (Until they are teenagers anyway). I also want to keep my guest room. All of our family lives out of town so its important for me to have a room for guests to come and stay. So space for Raya’s room was very very limited.

I knew I wanted a neutral theme to blend a guest room and nursery together. I first spotted the tropical “bananas for you” Sleepyhead Pod and the Maccie Blanket with tropical leaves and I knew I wanted a tropical theme. I know its very “on trend” at the moment, and I normally steer away from “trends”, but this is too gorgeous and so refreshing. I then also found a gorgeous tropical bumper from “Delicious Monsters” on Instagram, a local company based in Durban. Claire from “Gathered by Claire” custom made me a felt banner for my little fierce princess, which fits in perfectly with our theme and when another friend of mine relocated to Amsterdam, I jumped at the chance to buy her white crib, literally having sold our old cot a month before I fell pregnant.

This left little space in the room for anything else (we already had the queen sized bed in it), but I still didn’t have a compactum, or any drawers for clothes, or shelving! I searched the net for a while, but everything I found was a little too long, or wide or bulky for the space.

Enter CoziCot 🙂 I contacted CoziCot hand asked them to custom make me a compactum drawer set and some bookshelves based on a design I had seen and on the measurements I was working with. I wanted the bookshelf to fit flush against the back of the cupboard, as it was really the only space it could fit, and the compactum to squeeze into the corner next to the crib. They made up the furniture according to my requests and delivered it fully assembled. The quality of the finish is incredible and the drawers have a “soft close” to them. The bookcase is everything I imaged and the size and height are perfect! I am absolutely thrilled with the results and my hubby wants me to contact them again to do some drawers for our bedroom and the boys room.

So now I have a guest room and a baby room in one. Its not overbearing or screaming with pink anywhere, and I still have enough shelf space in the cupboards for guests to use. Its not complete yet, I’ve been looking for a hanging element to hand under the shelf above the changing mat for a while and I think I spotted the perfect one from Clever Little Monkey made by Tiger Lily that i think will complete the room perfectly!

Did you have a nursery for all of your children? Id love to see other shared spaces and how you have managed to balance the two. How would you style it?

Win a Keedo Voucher – Eid Outfit Inspiration For Kids With Keedo

Win a Keedo Voucher – Eid Outfit Inspiration For Kids With Keedo

Posted on by Rebecca

The excitement of the morning, waking up before sunrise to prepare for the morning prayer, getting dressed in your very best clothes, eating delicious food and receiving “Eidee” (presents/money) from family. Eid is such a special day for children around the world. Its a celebration of accomplishments and the blessings that we have to be thankful for, to signify the end of the holy month of Ramadaan. With a little over a week to go until the special day, parents everywhere are starting to shop around for Eid outfits for their kids.

It can be hard to find something that looks good, feels good, and can last for a whole day of prayers and festivities. I normally find it to be such a challenge to find cute outfits for the boys that they are able to comfortably play around and last the whole day in. Its either got to be super casual, because if I do go more formal, the jeans are normally too stiff for them to play at ease.

Keedo’s new “Twilight Garden” range has a slightly more formal look to it, whilst still maintaining the comfort and durability that they are known for, making it perfect for special occasions like Eid. Keedo is one of my favourite brands for children, and the fact that I can finally venture into the pretty girls side, makes my heart jump for joy! They are proudly South African and are ethically made, producing clothes that are made for the “adventurous child” who embraces life to the full and loves to be outside and exploring. Sounds like my boys!

I chose for the boys (or rather they chose for themselves), for Yusuf: the “Bookworm Top”, I love the classic lines of this long sleeve top and its a gorgeous thicker fabric with a stretch to it. Stone wash jeans and a Canvas Jacket. For Aadam we chose the “Take Flight” vest, Tab Shirt, Boys Jeans and Smart Cap. I even picked up something for baby Raya Maryam!

The boys will be able to comfortably play around and last the whole day in their Eid clothes this year, and they are already fighting over who gets which outfit! Check out your nearest Keedo Store or online to have a look at your Eid Inspiration.

Giveaway – Win a Keedo Voucher

To help you along the way together with Keedo, I’ll be giving away a R350 Voucher for you to spend towards your shopping! Entering is as simple as following both “In these Stilettos” and Keedo on Instagram and commenting on the picture what you love most about Keedo! Winner will be announced on Monday June 3rd 2019, allowing you enough time to squeeze in your Eid shopping!

Eid Mubarak !!

*Disclaimer* I received a Keedo Voucher to purchase these items, but all opinions and views are my own.

I Lost My Cool – When You Get Frustrated With Baby

I Lost My Cool – When You Get Frustrated With Baby

Posted on by Rebecca

One of the reasons I started blogging again was this very season, this season of “parenting a newborn”. It can be so incredibly isolating and tiring on your soul. And today, today I lost my cool and got snapped back into reality by my 5-year-old. The physical and mental exhaustion, and constant attention needed got to me, I found myself taking out my frustrations on an innocent 4-week-old.

I find the newborn phase the most challenging. Even after 3 kids, raising a newborn requires a certain amount of patience that I don’t possess. Both my boys were colicky, but both had slight reflux as well. I would walk up and down with them for hours and broke down in tears many times. Raya Maryam certainly hasn’t been “colicky” yet but come 4pm everyday all she wants is her mama, and her mama’s boobs 🙂 Should you not give her any of those things the crying begins. Along with that of course, comes the winds. Each time she falls asleep, I lift her onto my shoulder to burp. Occasionally one or two come out straight away, but then the rest of the time I feel her little body pull up and tenses up completely. She arches her back and starts complaining and sometimes, like tonight, there is just no calming her down. You can try different methods, the shoulder burp, the “leaning forward and rubbing her back” method, the over the knee method, nothing helps to calm her but the boob. Fast forward 3 hours of playing on the “merry go around” of feeding, falling asleep, trying to burp, her little body cramping up and crying; I could feel myself patting her back a little TOO hard. Rocking back and forth a little too hard and shouting at my baby to “stop it”. Like a 4-week-old can understand and listen to me. The frustration was taking over, and I was putting it on my precious baby.

The boys were falling asleep in their beds on either side of me and my 5 year old, sensing my frustration and change in temperament,  sat up in bed and said “Mummy let me take her, I know how to take care of a baby” “really?”, “Yes” he proclaimed, “my teacher showed me, hold them gently like this and move and sing softly to them, you are being too rough.” BOOM.  Snap back to reality that I so needed by my sweet son.

I took a deep breath, said a prayer, kissed my sweet little baby and I gave her patience that I pulled out from the deepest corner of my soul. Hubby wasn’t around at the time, but if he was I certainly would have passed baby onto him earlier on. I remember being at this point with both the boys when they were newborns too, on that snapping point from sheer frustration. Its scary. Its scary to realise how fine that line is and I’m so grateful to have realised beforehand, before I tipped over and accidently hurt my child.

The point of this article of not to get judgement, nor to look for advice on “what could be wrong”.  I know I know we need to get into the feed, wake, sleep cycle but that’s something I have always battled with in the early days. I feed on demand for the first few months.

The point of this article is to let all new moms out there know that “it will be ok”. As a first-time mom the experience of motherhood can be incredibly lonely and isolated. I want you to know that at some point we all will get “frustrated” with our babies. It doesn’t make you a bad parent. Most people will not admit to “getting angry with their baby”, but I’ve been where you are. I’ve cried while my baby cried, I’ve stopped myself from rocking them a little too hard. I’ve felt my nerves reaching snapping point and wondered if I may have hurt my baby. I’ve felt so guilty that I’ve broken down in tears.  Motherhood is wonderful and magical and at the same time awful and hard. Even on my 3rd child I still have these moments.

Don’t be afraid to refuel and recharge. The beautiful thing about motherhood it sometimes all you need is a 5-minute break. Don’t be afraid to just put baby down and walk away for a short while, your sanity is the most crucial thing. Babies also feel emotions. If you are tense and frustrated, they wont be settled. They need soft love and care (one of the reasons my babies settle easier with me typically and not dad).

Don’t be afraid to reach out to someone, another mum. We have all been there and I promise, most mums I have met will never judge. Don’t feel ashamed for your feelings or your response to motherhood. By speaking out you are getting help. Finding a group of mums that you can talk to or that have children similar ages can be a God-send. Just getting out and talking about it airs your frustrations.

No excuse me while I go and kiss my precious bundle. Tomorrow is a new day and a new start, with hopefully a recharged milk supply for this lil monster 🙂